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Parental Guide's Rating of the Movie Colombiana
MPAA Rating
PG-13
for violence, disturbing images, intense sequences of action, sexuality and brief strong language
Genre
Action
Director
Olivier Megaton
Starring
Zoe Saldana, Michael Vartan, Jordi Mollà, Lennie James, Cliff Curtis
Studio
Sony
Release Date/In Theaters
8/26/2011
Movie Summary for Colombiana
Cataleya saw her parents killed when she was a young girl and she dedicated her life to revenge. She becomes a professional killer and works in the criminal underworld to find the gangster who killed her parents.
- by Ginger
Colombiana is an endearing movie about a girl who witnesses her parent’s murder in Bogota. The sweet little girl witnessed the act and it changed her life forever. She grows up to become a trained assassin. Her main motivation is that she wants to find and kill the assassins that killed her own parents. That is the entire plot in a nutshell. This family guide to the movies has a few problems with the MPAA rating of PG-13 right from the beginning.
This film is from the creators of a classic movie called La Femme Nikita, which portrayed a stone-cold sexy female assassin. This movie, has a few similarities and the character in this movie is another stone-cold sexy female assassin. The only redeeming quality in terms of whether it is a family movie or not is that she is after drug lords. Other than that, this movie is not recommended for young teens. It comes close to being an adult movie only. Let’s examine a short resume of the reasons why.
First, it is a very violent movie. According to the MPAA, the movie did not really show any dead bodies, just lumps with blood around them. That is true for the most part, but just because body parts cannot be distinguished does not mean that our kids don’t get it. The MPAA did not consider this movie “graphic”. This family movie review disagrees. The “bloody lumps” still convey the same message. Our kids are more intelligent than that. It does not have to be bloody to be considered gory. There are several killings in the movie, all of them violent.
There were many scenes with the main character in her bra and panties, several times with a gun strapped to her waist and nothing below the gun belt. The MPAA considered the partial nudity to be “Discreet”. What? The shower scene almost crossed the line to an “R” technically and might have for a second. In other scenes, the shirts that the main character is wearing are see through. There is a scene involving one man and several females in bed, all scantily clad. In another scene, the female lead character jumps up and wraps her legs around a man while wearing one of the aforementioned see though shirts. The MPAA said that the movie did not have nudity or sexual content. They considered this movie to be appropriate for 13 year olds? Really?
Now let’s talk about language. I lost count of the bad language early on in the first several scenes. Yes, they f-bombed it several times. The MPAA did not consider the movie to have scenes with drugs or alcohol. What? Were they asleep? The entire movie centers around the drug trade in Columbia. When the car in the beginning of the movie slams into the police car and someone begins firing an automatic weapon, it is a Captain Morgan bottle that rolls out of the car. The person’s actions indicate that she has obviously been drinking it. The MPAA reviewers might have missed this little detail, but Parental Guide to the movies did not.
The MPAA rated this one a PG-13, but they could not even string together a few scenes that were appropriate for all audiences. The disclaimer at the beginning of the movie trailer says that it is approved for “appropriate audiences”. They could not even come up with 2 minutes that were approved for all audiences. This is an adult movie with adult themes, and definitely adult scenes. This family movie review cannot find any family values in this movie, unless you with to teach your kids that revenge and violence can lead them to a wonderful future career as an assassin. This family movie review has to disagree with the PG-13 rating for this one.